Sunday, January 31, 2010

Real-Life Disaster Dates

Today as I was surfing through TV channels, I came across a program on MTV titled "Disaster Date."

The premise of this hidden-camera show, as far as I could gather, is that people purposefully set up their friends on really terrible blind dates. Cameras capture every groan-inducing moment, and everyone involved is an actor and is in on the joke with the exception of, of course, the person being set up. As soon as the date ends, which usually happens when the victim walks out on the person or on the situation, he or she is given a dollar for each minute the date lasted.

Sounds like real entertaining and high-quality TV programming, huh? I suppose this is all meant to be humorous, but I found myself sympathizing each time with and feeling sorry for the poor, unsuspecting people being set up on these bad dates.

Keep in mind, MTV is the same network that has brought us other TV classics such as "The Hills" and "The Real World," to name just a few.

Why did this show bother me so much? In the first place, "reality" TV, I have found, is mostly a waste of time and nowhere near to actual reality. In the second place, friends and acquaintances have set me up on several disaster dates of my own over the years.

I know that my friends don't intend to create these bad dates, but more often than not that is the result. Chalk it up to a number of things, perhaps: a lack of careful planning and just needing two extra bodies, whoever they may be, to double-date with; overzealousness that two completely unalike friends might hit it off; trying to emulate Jane Austen's Emma Woodhouse; etc. Also, you can really learn a lot about how people view you by the kinds people with whom they choose to set you up.

Even-more disastrous, I have found, is when people want to set you up with someone, they give you that person's phone number and/or e-mail address, wash their hands of the matter, pat you on the back, and say, "Good luck!" Due to several bad experiences after having been given only e-mail addresses/phone numbers, I now have a strict policy that people wanting to set me up need to either introduce me to that person personally or need to accompany me on a double-date, no exceptions.

This very week, a friend of mine who has in the past set me up with less-than-stellar matches is again wanting me to meet a friend of his. Is there any tactful way to tell him, "Thanks, but no thanks"? Just wondering if anyone has any helpful input and/or what your thoughts or strategies are on the matter.

As for me, I am changing the channel.

4 comments:

Nancy Roche said...

Being a more popular person than I, you must be in no great want of dates, but my gut reaction is pity for the girl to think you sound unsympathetic.

You must be so very tired of disappointment and wasted evenings. I feel that. I also think you have a big heart, with room enough to help one more girl feel a little better about herself for a couple of hours. I wish you'd given her a chance.

Jonathan Plowman said...

Once more, in English please? Just to avoid any confusion, whom are you talking about?

Jen said...

Jon, take the hint. Ask Nancy out. Pity her for one night and see if you like her. That's what she was getting at. In case you needed clarification.

Oh, and we'll gladly double with you. ;)

Bryan and Jen

Jonathan Plowman said...

Jen: I asked her straight up if that's what she was referring to, and she denied it.