Morons on the Loose

Earlier tonight, Dave and Jessica and their three kids, who are in the middle of a visit to Jessica's parents (who are serving a mission at the Mormon Battalion Visitors Center) in San Diego, were stopped at a traffic light when an 18-year-old drunk driver, traveling (according to Dave's estimate) somewhere between 40 and 50 MPH, plowed into the back of their van, sending them 50 yards forward and totaling the vehicle.

When police arrived on the scene, they administered a breathalyzer test, which registered a blood alcohol level of .22, to the drunk driver. That's twice the legal limit - even in California.

Dave further tells me that it was the girl's second DUI offense - let alone the fact that she hasn't legally reached the drinking age - and she was driving a stolen car, to boot.

Fortunately, no one was seriously hurt. Two-year-old Kira was taken to a local hospital to be checked out, and she's fine, but everyone suffered bumps and bruises. I can only imagine that the worst part of this ordeal is the psychological effect it has taken on the three kids.

After I spoke with Dave on the phone and was assured that everyone was okay, he sent me these pictures of the totaled vehicle:

We are extremely grateful and are counting our blessings this evening that nothing worse occurred, and we hope that Dave and Jessica and their clan will soon return home safely.

I also sincerely hope that the drunk driver is not allowed behind a steering wheel, if ever again, for a very long time. Holding a driver's license, unfortunately, is too often treated as a right rather than a privilege in our country, and it is one that is far too often abused.

What Women Want

Today's Random Question out of Nowhere is: What do women really want?

The reason I pose this question is twofold:

(1) I recently watched the 2000 Mel Gibson/Helen Hunt movie What Women Want for the first time. It got me thinking about what women really do want. As far as I could gather, the movie answers this question with: Women want Mel Gibson - not just somebody who looks like Mel Gibson (sorry, Steve), that is, but the Mel Gibson. Or, at least, they did back in 2000, which was a few years before drunk driving destroyed his career.

(2) After all of these years of dating, I have absolutely no clue as to what women really want. (Any girl who's ever been on a date with me is somewhere nodding her head in agreement right now.)


My experiences with the last girl I dated, I must admit, also warped my mind, to some extent, as to the answer to this question. It is a long, complicated story, but in a nutshell: After our first few dates, she began to ignore and avoid me. A year-and-a-half later, she suddenly decided that I was worth talking to again, straight out of the blue. Following a month of dating, she asked me to please leave her alone. The next day, she showed up at my doorstep and asked me to reconsider. Three weeks after that, she said that it "wasn't working for her" and then proceeded to ignore me again. Two months later, she pulled me aside after a ward activity and explained that she had broken up with me because she feared it was hurting the feelings of a friend. A month later, she flaked out on me again like so many bits of dandruff. Like a dog who follows his master anywhere and everywhere, I went along with the whole ordeal gullibly, too.

Too much information? Too late. The point is, I could never figure out exactly what it was that she wanted and could never tell at any given moment whether I was coming or going. Suffice to say, I learned that (1) she wished to spend time with me and (2) she couldn't stand to spend time with me.


Years ago, when I was in the Young Men's program, we would have those "qualities that Young Women look for in Young Men, and vice-versa" lessons once a year. This was the lesson in which leaders would write all of the desired characteristics listed by men and women, respectively, on the chalkboard. I always tried to take good mental notes during these lessons and would try to develop said characteristics.

The Relief Society in my brother's singles ward recently had one of these lessons. I I had a conversation with him about it, discussing which kinds of things the sisters (the 2009 version) desired in a mate. Among the items they listed, they desire someone who is: thoughtful, goal-oriented, patient, educated, a worthy priesthood holder (has a testimony, attends meetings, etc.), service oriented, hard working, has a good sense of humor, is good-looking, attempts to communicate, and shares common interests.


Questions for Discussion: What does "thoughtful" mean, exactly? People with O.C.D. are the most "thoughtful" people I know. Isn't "goal-oriented" just code for "has muscles and a jeep"? When women say that they find a "sense of humor" appealing, does this mean that they like guys who are funny or just those who will laugh at certain kinds of things?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Note: Before I receive a slew of angry comments comparing me to Attila the Hun's toe jam, I should state for the record that I ask this random question not to criticize nor to complain but because I honestly am wanting to know what it is that woment want.