A Soft Answer

Flattery will get you everywhere with me.

What does that mean, exactly? you ask? Basically, I am a sucker for compliments. I may not get them as often as, say, Paula Abdul gives them out, but when I do, I can very easily be put on the spot and become a little red in the cheeks.

Such was the case Friday night after our Improvables show, when a teenage girl came up to me and told me that I was her "favorite" performer and that she "loved" me - in a platonic, friendly way, of course.

It's always nice to hear things like that after a show. In fact, they really make your day. For one thing, they let you know that you must be doing something right, as self-conscious as one can get while trying to do Improv and making a nincompoop out of oneself in front of dozens, if not hundreds, of people. Many of my fellow Improvers have told me that they, too, have often received compliments along these same lines after our shows.

How much nicer would our society be if we all complimented each other more often? That's a rhetorical question, so I don't necessarily expect any comments on it - but I think you catch my drift.

Giving out compliments is one of the things I admire most about females, because they do it so often and so well. It's definitely one of the ways in which I need to improve in my interactions with other people.

A few years ago, when the ComedySportz branch in Sugar House was still operating, I attended a training session that was led by three full-time Improvisers from the Los Angeles branch of the club. During one activity, we were each asked to go around the room, shake hands with each one of our colleagues, look them in the eyes, and give them each one compliment. They, in turn, would offer a compliment back to us.

What ensued was one of the neatest Improv experiences I have ever been party to. People who I had never seen act anything but goofy and silly soon broke down in tears of joy. Because everyone who participated in the activity did so with sincerity and honesty, it was an edifying experience for all involved. I learned a lot of things about a lot of people that day. I also learned that it was much harder for me to take compliments than to give them.

I think the scripture states it well:

Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another.

Romans 14:19