My Dinner with Jenna

Last Friday, it was my niece Jenna's eighth birthday, and, ergo, it was her turn for the latest birthday dinner and shopping trip outing with Uncle Paco.

Earlier tonight, I took Jenna out for a lavish dinner at McDonald’s. Lest you think me a cheapskate - and it wouldn't be the first time someone has had that thought - keep in mind that the kids get to pick where they want to eat.

Jenna's meal included chocolate milk (I didn't know you could get that at McDonald's, but it is apparently now a Happy Meal option) and Chicken McNuggets. I hadn't come into that close of contact with McNuggets since last year's failed attempt at winning the "McNuggets Challenge" (downing 50 McNuggets in one sitting), and it appears that I still have no desire whatsoever to eat another McNugget ever again.


At any rate, after dinner, we headed over to Target so that Jenna could pick out her own birthday gift, and she ended up choosing a couple of Zoobles - whatever those are. (Her mother assures me that they are the "in" thing right now.)

She didn’t say much throughout the evening, but then again, I don't know too many eight-year-olds who will necessarily talk your ears off. Plus, I'm betting Jenna's mind was on her family's impending trip to San Diego, for which they will be leaving early in the morning.

I enjoyed my evening out with the birthday girl, and we're looking forward to big events for her in the near future, such as her upcoming baptism into the Church.

The McNuggets Challenge

Somehow - and I'm still trying to figure out just how it happened - I got roped into a McNuggets Challenge earlier today.

What is the "McNuggets Challenge"? you ask?

Dave Chabries, a former Millstreamer and a mutual friend of mine and Ryan's, came up with the idea for the McNuggets Challenge. The other day, he purchased 50 McDonald's Chicken Nuggets (their current promotion is 50 McNuggets for $9.99) and consumed all 50 within 14 minutes.

Well, following today's Improvables workshop at the theater, Ryan suggested giving the challenge a try and invited any who wanted to participate to do so. Taylor and I were the only takers. What possessed us to do this? It's all in the Y chromosome, says I - one of those dumb things that boys do because they feel the need to. As it turns out, Brian and Matt, who witnessed the event but did not participate, were wise beyond their years in choosing to abstain.

At the outset, it seemed like a great idea. Here is the "before" picture of me, Ryan, and Taylor:


Notice that we are smiling. Also, notice the 150 Chicken McNuggets piled up on the table as well as the various sauces and dips.


Breaking Dave's record of downing 50 McNuggets in 14 minutes not only seemed like a fun idea, it initially appeared to be rather easy. The McNuggets were served in five containers of 10 McNuggets each; getting through the first couple of boxes was, indeed, not difficult at all.

After that, things slowed down in a hurry. By the time we reached our respective third boxes, it quickly became apparent that we had little-to-no chance left of besting Dave's mark in 14 minutes. Not only that, it also became very apparent that we would be lucky to reach 50 McNuggets at all. In time, the voices around me began to turn into the nonsensical trombone notes of the adults in Charlie Brown's world. The more I ate, the harder it became and the more my head started to spin. It was the oddest feeling of being "full" I have ever had in my life - and I have four years' experience living and eating in Latin America to back that up.

In time, Taylor rushed to the McDonald's bathroom to throw up and got within three feet (by his estimate; I wasn't about to see for myself) of the bathroom sink. Ryan also later threw up when we arrived back at the Rodgers parking lot. All told, I finished 44 McNuggets, and both Ryan and Taylor were not far behind with close to 40 apiece.

Here's the "after" picture:


Notice that we are no longer smiling.

Before today, it had been at least five or six years since I had last eaten a Chicken McNugget, and I guess I had forgotten that I am not really a fan of them. After today, if I never eat another Chicken McNugget again, it'll be too soon.